- You want to slap the next person who says, "Must be nice to work from 8 to 3 and have your summers free!"
- You have no time for a life from August to June
- You laugh uncontrollably when people refer to the staff room as the "lounge"
- You've ever had your profession slammed by someone who would never dream of doing your job
- You can't have children because there are no names you could give a child that wouldn't bring on high blood pressure the moment you heard it uttered.
- You think caffine should be available to staff in IV form
- You believe chocolate is a food group.
- You can tell it's a full moon whithout ever looking outside.
- You believe that unspeakable evil will befall if anyone says, "Boys, the kids sure are mellow today."
- When out in public you feel the urge to talk to strange children and correct their behavior.
- Your personal life comes to a screeching halt at report card time
- Marking all A's on report cards would make your life so much simpler
- When you mention "vegetables" you're not talking about a food group
- Meeting a child's parents instantly answers the question "Why is this kid like this?"
- You think people should be required to get a government permit before being allowed to reproduce
- You wonder how some parents ever MANAGED to reproduce
- You believe "shallow gene pool" should have its own box on report cards
- You encourage an obnoxious parent to check into charter schools or home schooling
- You believe no one should be permitted to reproduce without having taught in an elementary setting for 5 years
- You know you're in for a MAJOR project when a parent says, "I have a great idea I'd like to discuss. I think it would be such fun."
- You smile weakly, but want to choke a person when he/she says, "Oh you must have such FUN every day. It must be like playtime for you."
- You believe the staff room should be equiped with a Valium salt lick.
- You find humor in other people's stupidity
- You believe in aerial spraying of Prozac
You've been in education too long if...