- you can analyze the significance of appliances you cannot operate.
- your carrel is better decorated than your apartment.
- you have ever, for a folklore project, attempted to track the progress of your own joke across the Internet.
- you are startled to meet people who neither need nor want to read.
- you have ever brought a scholarly article to a bar.
- you rate coffee shops by the availability of outlets for your laptop.
- everything reminds you of something in your discipline.
- you have ever discussed academic matters at a sporting event.
- you have ever spent more than $50 on photocopies while researching a single paper.
- there is a microfiche reader in the library that you consider ``yours''
- you actually have a preference between microfilm and microfiche.
- you can tell the time of day by looking at the traffic flow at the library.
- you look forward to summers because you're more productive without the distraction of classes.
- you regard ibuprofen as a vitamin.
- you consider all papers to be works in progress.
- your professors don't really care when you turn in your work anymore.
- you find the bibliographies of books more interesting than the actual text.
- you have given up trying to keep your books organized and are now just trying to keep them all in the same general area.
- you have accepted guilt as an inherent feature of relaxation.
- you reflexively start analyzing those Greeks letters before you realize that it's just a sorority sweatshirt and not an equation.
- you find yourself explaining to young children that you are in the "20th" grade.
- you start referring to stories like "Snow White, et. al."
- you frequently wonder how long you can live on pasta without getting scurvy.
- you look forward to taking some time off to do laundry.
- you have more photocopy cards than credit cards.
- you wonder if APA style allows you to cite talking to yourself as "personal communication".
Thanks to Antone for this gem.